July 28, 2010
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  1. December 12th, 2009 12:47 am #16
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    I think a lot of people get "bisexual" and "bi-curious" mixed up. One is a real orientation, while the other is what happens when Ms. Suzy Homemaker-Soccermom gets bored and/or tipsy and thinks it would be fun to use another human being as a sex toy for her and her husband/boyfriend.

    At least that's been my observation after perusing cragislist.
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  2. December 12th, 2009 07:47 am #17
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    Dang, Seeker.
    There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
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  3. December 14th, 2009 07:03 am #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by seeker View Post
    You know, when I'm in a relationship with a woman and am dissatisfied, I think I should be with a man. And when I'm with a man and am dissatisfied, I think I should be with a woman. I am rarely satisfied.
    perhaps reevaluate your relationship outside the context of biological sex. would you reject a woman for exhibiting the same negative personality traits as your current male partner? would you reject a man for exhibiting the same negative personality traits as your current female partner?
    Traveling beyond the bounds, we have to take that step. What are we waiting for? It's now or never. Fear to see the world to be, it's why we hesitate. Repeat the same mistake, hoping to break new ground... the blue bird flies away.
    -Maki Kimura "Beyond the Bounds"
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  4. December 14th, 2009 11:26 am #19
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    I'm definitely bisexual, not bi-curious. I've been in love with both.
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  5. December 14th, 2009 12:44 pm #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by switch96 View Post
    perhaps reevaluate your relationship outside the context of biological sex. would you reject a woman for exhibiting the same negative personality traits as your current male partner? would you reject a man for exhibiting the same negative personality traits as your current female partner?
    The negative personality traits with a woman are completely different than the negative personality traits of a man. It's not the sex aspect that dissatisfies me, it's all the bullsh*t involved in a relationship. And the bullsh*t is different in a female/female relationship than the bullsh*t in a female/male relationship. I have yet to find a relationship, outside of my pets, that hasn't had a fair share of bullsh*t. I have a low threshold for it. I tend to want to quit and run. I'm really not relationship material.
    We tend to defend vigorously things that in our deepest hearts we are not quite certain about. If we are certain of something we know, it doesn't need defending. -
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  6. December 14th, 2009 08:19 pm #21
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    Wink

    Thanks LadyZen...I agree that perhaps it doesn't really matter with gender, except that I am fulfilled in a way I've never been before (this is my first serious relationship with a woman after being married for 8 years to a man). If I look at bisexuality simply as sex - then I feel that I am bisexual because I never found sex with a man to be necessarily unpleasant. I think sex is sex and it should always feel good...and I could sleep with a man tomorrow and it wouldn't be awful...I may even enjoy it physically. But I think my preference sexually and emotionally and certainly in a relationship is and perhaps has always been for women. I think back to my close girlfriends and how they always had way more sway over me than any man I dated - even my ex-husband. So, I'm not sure then if I'm gay - fine, I'm okay with that word and label, or if I'm bisexual - because I prefer women although I guess I could be with either (physically only). Not sure if this makes sense but that's how I've been looking at it and luckily my gfriend feels the same way. Although we are both totally only into each other!!
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  7. January 23rd, 2010 03:09 am #22
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    Y'know I'm glad I've found this thread.

    I've posted elsewhere about my struggle to announce that I'm gay, given that I've never had a relationship and to me it feels like a big fraud.

    Add to that the fact that I find men physically more attractive to look at than women, but I will only ever flirt with women and frankly wouldn't have a clue HOW to flirt with a fella....well.......

    There were lots of great responses to the thread, including the suggestion that I may be 'bi'. THEN you start to read all the BS about the crap that bi men and women have to put up with from straight and gay people alike. I mean sheesh......

    My feelings on sexuality are that for 99% of the population, it is a natural phenomena..it's all genes, chromosomes and your brain's wiring. Given that there are 6 billion people on this earth, I DON'T believe that there are only 2 clear cut sexual orientations.

    Referring myself as 'bi-sexual' relieves an awful lot of pressure off me to the point where I can relax and think 'okay, how do I feel about him/her?' As opposed to thinking you know who you are and walking into a straight bar, seeing a gorgeous guy and instantly feeling crushed because "here we go again, what the Hell am I then?!!!"

    Maybe I should really throw the cat amongst the pigeons and start a thread on 'asexuality'!!!
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  8. January 24th, 2010 11:38 am #23
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    I like the label "tri-sexual". I'll try anything once.
    We tend to defend vigorously things that in our deepest hearts we are not quite certain about. If we are certain of something we know, it doesn't need defending. -
    Madeleine L'Engle
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